13 Months Later…
From: Emma
To: Gerry
To: Gerry
Date: July 8, 2009
Dear Gerry,
Hello! I have not
forgotten you! I have to start by saying
I am so sorry to not have written sooner.
You have probably been wondering what is going on with my writing, and
the truth is nothing much has been going on for a long time. I kept thinking that I would begin it
soon. I wanted to wait until there was
more to report before writing, but that led to a much longer than I
intended. So, with the apologies out of
the way…
First of all, I want to thank you so much for coming to see
me in Philly last year. When you came
across the courtyard and said those things, it felt like an intervention by my
muse, telling me to wake up, slow down, and not forget. From that time forth, I have had a shift in
my perspective. It made me realize that
the creative muse has been trying for years to get my attention, to give me
important messages, if I was ever quiet enough to listen. But then as the years went by and I listened
less and less, the voice grew quieter, and I just sort of forgot about it. But its absence made my life dimmer, more
mechanical, just survival, but not living.
So, as much as I would have loved to just chuck it all and
start writing back then, I knew I couldn’t, since I had to keep working,
studying, etc. But here is what I did: I
took a two-week vacation in August (two months after you came to see me) and
instead of going anywhere, I just stayed home and allowed myself to think about
the writing. Within a day, the old magic
was back, and I was furiously writing! I
let new ideas come through instead of going back to old outdated ideas from my
journals and notes. I wanted to connect
with the energy of writing, not rewriting. I wrote some essays, but mostly
generated ideas for further writing projects, and started two manuscripts.
In some ways, during that two weeks, I was afraid of opening
that Pandora’s box of writing ideas, afraid that they would inundate me, and
that it would be that much harder and more painful to put them back onto the
shelf after I had liberated them.
I also started to realize that this particular job
(Coordinator at McBride) is just not right for me, because it is SO many extra
hours. I graduated last month with my
MBA, and I have already gotten a new job lined up, as an Office Manager. But here is the difference. It is 24 hours a week (three full days),
instead of 50-60 hours a week as my old job was! Plus, since I am done my coursework, I will
have SO much more time to write. My
hourly salary has gone up a little, although my total salary is going down a
bit since I am working less. But I have
saved up a little money, and still have some of my student loan money, so I
should be OK for a while as is. SO the
plan is to try to start making some money writing. I guess I am jumping out of the plane and building
my parachute on the way down. But I
prefer to think of it as having a balloon with a slow leak, and needing to
manufacture more helium before I hit rock bottom!
I know that with my MBA, I could probably get a better job,
but this one is just temporary, and I really want to work part-time so I don’t
get buried by work again. And the goal
is to eventually make part or all of my living as a writer so that I won’t have
to rely on a job as my sole income.
Anyhow, that is the plan!
So, yes, I would definitely love to talk to you about ideas
on how I can make this writing career work.
I have been reading a few books on the subject, and I also will be
meeting with a marketing coach soon, who can help me with pinpointing my
writing for the market, and he’ll also advise me on website, book proposals,
professional speaking opportunities, etc.
Please email or call me; I am looking forward to hearing from you!
I am feeling very excited about this, as you can see!!!
Thanks, Cuz!
Emma
From: Gerry
To: Emma
To: Emma
Date: July 9, 2009
Dear Emma,
Wow! I am very
excited to hear all this! You really
worked through the situation with patience, cleverness, and vision. I think it will be all better from now
on. Well, I want to start by saying that
you should not apologize AT ALL for not writing sooner. I didn’t write either, and the internet works
both ways, haha. But really, I was
aware that such changes and influences take time to take root, so I was giving
you that time to sort it out.
I had to laugh at your imagery of the “intervention by my
muse” in your previous email. I imagined
the scene of walking into my living room to find my creative muse and some
characters from one of my unfinished novels sitting around on my couch and easy
chair saying, “Gerry, we have to talk.”
Now that would be a good scene for a movie or skit! I can already see what a fertile mind you
have for allegory.
You have a lot to look forward to, as you turn to writing as
a profession. I think you cannot help
but succeed. Welcome! Writing is a noble profession. It builds bridges between minds, between
continents, between centuries. There are
so many different ways to describe it that I can’t limit myself to just
one. So, in the spirit of allegory:
Writing is like putting out colored yarn near a bird feeder,
and letting the birds take it as nesting material. It spreads far and wide, and you may see
evidence of it in use later.
Writing is like tracing a shadow, so that the same shadow
can pass over other readers in their turn.
Writing is like unfolding a paper that is tightly folded, a
note passed to you in class.
Writing is like pulling up water from a well.
Writing is like digging in a mine for jewels
This exercise is only one of many, by the way, that I use
when I am brainstorming and developing ideas.
I will tell you more sometime! It
will be interesting to see which exercises you find useful. Basically, as I said last year, I am always
available as a resource to help advise or guide you in this journey, while
always recognizing, of course, that you know your own mind and creativity
best. One idea that you might like is to
send me an article or whatever you are working on each month, to have accountability
and get feedback.
Take care, and I’ll talk to you soon!
Gerry
From: Emma
To: Gerry
To: Gerry
Date: July 12, 2009
Thank you, Gerry!
Yes, I will definitely send you something once a month. I am not sure how many pages it will be, but
at least it will be something! I am
looking forward to this being a year of working part-time and writing
part-time, and seeing where it leads.
The analogies about writing were great! I especially like the one about water from
the well. That is how I think of writing.
Fluid, universal, present everywhere, necessary for life… I meditated
upon that image yesterday, and it brought up a question. My first question for you about writing!
It is this: When I write, I do feel that I am drawing up
water from a well. I listen to my inner
voice and write down all sorts of disjointed notes and ideas, but then what?
Once the water gets brought up from the well, it just sort of sits around. It reminds me of the saying, “Water, water,
everywhere, but not a drop to drink.” In
short, how can I determine how to turn an idea into a finished product? How can I figure out what form the idea will
take? Will it be a book? An article?
Fiction? Non-fiction? I feel stuck at the phase of turning all my
notes into finished works to share with others.
People always say, “Edit and revise” but that just turns into
proofreading or crossing out some words and putting synonyms in their
place. People always talk about
“writer’s block,” but this is a little different. Writers block is when you just have a blank
page and don’t know what to write. I
have lots of pages of scribbled (and types) notes, but… now what? No one could make head nor tail of them. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Emma
From: Gerry
To: Emma
To: Emma
Date: July 19, 2009
Dear Emma,
Hello! I was so
pleased to get your email last week. I
have been formulating a response to your question about how to determine what
form a finished work will take. It is a
very good question. I’ll start out by
saying that anything I say is provisional, is just how I see it now, but isn’t
the final “truth” by any means. Please
feel free to modify, reject, or put aside any of my ideas at any time, of
course!
I thought about your question and tried writing down my
thoughts on it, but the instructions about drafts, revisions, etc. just didn’t
convey the inner truth I was trying to access.
So I put it aside for a day or two, and the answer came to me as a
essay. I think that’s very ironic, that
your question “What form will a finished work take?” actually caused me to have
a crisis about figuring out what form to write my finished answer in! Finally it crystallized for me, as you will
see in the accompanying essay, which answers your question in allegory:
The Water From the Well
When we hear an excellent speaker, or read the work of an
inspired writer, we feel bathed in the cool, pure, fresh waters of
thought. And what a delight it is when
we realize that we, too, have access to those same waters. Yes, we all have a deep well, a connection to
that eternal shared spring of creativity.
And so, one bright clear day we go out to the well and lower the
bucket. Splash. And so you pull up bucket after bucket of this
wonderful water and pour it into your lake.
Your stagnant brackish lake. The
ideas just sit there. The water's not
moving. There's not enough oxygen to
support any fish. There's just some red
algae pond scum floating on the top.
You've got notebooks and computer files full of ideas for speeches and
writings, perhaps even some attempts at fleshing out those ideas, but nothing
polished. You long to share this water
with people in nearby houses around the lake, to bring each a glass of
water. But no one could drink this water
in its present form. So you work on
it. You pour it through filters to
purify it, but flecks still float in it.
You put it into fancy glasses and bottles to give some shape and
structure. (Main ideas go here, supporting examples go here...) But these
artificial structures are imposed on the water from the outside. They just end up distorting and forcing the
water into an unnatural pattern. You
realize that the water must find its own pattern. But what is the natural pattern of
water? These H2O molecules are so
slippery and slidey, there's no way to get a hold of them, much less discover
their pattern. They seem to not have any
pattern at all, unless you force one onto them.
And so, frustrated, you turn away.
And cold settles over your lake.
You stop trying so hard. You stop
trying so hard. And that is the best
thing you could have done. Because water
does have a natural pattern. But it is
rarely seen. When you leave the lake
alone, one cold quiet morning, the chill air pulls the moisture upward,
naturally leaving the impurities behind.
Invisibly, the moisture in the air travels to every pane of glass in the
surrounding homes, even the shuttered attic window. And when the people open the curtains in the
morning, they smile to see the intricate images etched by the frost, the
natural crystalline structure of H2O. So
much more complex and beautiful and far-reaching than anything we could have
done by the force of our will, by conscious crafting. The miracle seems to have occurred without
our participation. And yet, we did
create this frost work, this speech, this writing, or rather, it discovered its
own natural structure through us. Even when
the water pooled in the brackish swamp, the frost pictures were hidden deep in
its molecular structure, waiting for the right conditions to express
themselves. So take heart. When the water is stagnant, the frost
pictures are hidden within. To bring
them out, we must put aside the need to control the material, and focus on discovering
the universal message hidden within. Our
touch must be as light as evaporation and condensation, our presence as
invisible as Jack Frost's.
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